23 August 2025
- bountymouse88
- Aug 27
- 10 min read
Division 1: Sprig + Fern Tahuna 1st XI Division 2: Sprig + Fern Tahuna 2nd XI
Division 3: Sprig + Fern Tahuna 3rd XI Division 4:
Women's Premiership: Sprig + Fern Tahuna Breakers Masters Football: Sprig + Fern Tahuna Masters
1st XI - No game
Location:
Goals:
Match MVP: Match report by
2nd XI 0-3 GB Mountain Goats
Location: Takaka Rec grounds
Goals:
Match MVP: Will
We made the trek to Golden Bay with half a squad missing (injuries and late-season weekend getaways doing us in), and a very reluctant Joe from the 1sts roped in for linesman duty and a possible cameo. The Mountain Goats, meanwhile, had half the town on their sideline, including their secret weapon: an actual goat. Not sure if he was cleared on Comet, but was probably happy just watching us suffer.
The tone was set inside a minute when IT calmly passed the ball straight out of play under no pressure for a corner. A bold statement of intent from Tahuna’s handsomest man. From there, Golden Bay’s front three ran riot. Will threw himself around to keep us in it, while Harry won every header going… except the crucial one where he was out-salmoned. Their lad flicked it on, and his mate finished neatly off the post for 1–0 on the stroke of half-time. The goat nodded approvingly.
Second half, Joe came on and immediately added glamour and comedic value. How many clubs can sub on a spare goalkeeper outfield in a top-of-the-table clash? Talk about squad depth. Sadly, the Goats were relentless. Another through ball, another sharp finish, top bins. 2–0. A smug baa was heard from the direction of the sideline goat.
Will kept us afloat with more saves, before we finally had our best period of the game and created a few chances. Ross, however, wasn’t having any of that “momentum” nonsense and decided to spice things up by catching the ball like he was auditioning for the Silver Ferns. Penalty. Will nearly got him out of jail with a strong hand, but 3–0 it was. Game over.
Fair result. We didn’t do enough. Jakeash circled for a landing up top, but, as it turns out, is better at finding runways than the goal. Still, we appreciated him flying Tahuna Airways for the day.
Goats are champions and off to Division 1. Us? Third place. A solid return for the season. Post-match hospo was top notch, so cheers to Golden Bay, who no doubt partied long into the night until the neighbours called noise control over some over-zealous baa-ing.
A week off for us, then a cup final on the 6th. Football’s coming home.
Match report by Will Murphy.
3rd XI 5-4 Richmond FC Thistle
Location: Jubilee Park Goals: OG, Sayha 2, Diego, Sobi
Match MVP: Oli Creed
What a season! After Tahuna clinched the title the previous week due to a Motueka default, the lads made their way to Jubilee Park hoping to emulate the 1sts after their incredible cup win the previous week on the same pitch. Safe to say they did it justice if not better!
Tahuna lined up with Thorsten in goal (apparently going down the west coast with his mrs was more important to Tom Dunn). Oli Creed back in his first game from injury playing alongside Matty "John Deere" Knight in the centre of defence. Also a start for Bernie at RB in apparently his "last game" for the 3rds (doubt that very much).
Tahuna kicked off knowing that whatever the result, they were already champions. Some good back and forth action in the middle of the park with Sobi and Will working well together. Binh getting some good shots off up top as Tahuna looked the better of the 2 teams in the opening 25mins. It would be Richmond that struck first as they utilised their youthfulness and managed to get away from Matty and to calmly slot the ball past Thorsten. Undeterred Tahuna kept coming back with Binh again coming close. But Richmond then managed to go 2-0 up on the day after a very suspect handball from a Richmond player to which the ref had his whistle in his mouth but then forgot how to blow it allowed the same player to smash it past an outstretched Thorsten. Richmond home fans going mental.
Tahuna picked themselves up and Oli ran straight over to Thorsten and demanded the GK jersey. Quick sub as Thorsten came off and Eric came on at CB. Tahuna pressed with Binh agonizingly sending it wide. Richmond buoyed by their 2 goals attacked, Oli sweeping up with no issue and then sending an absolute bomb deep into Richmond territory. A mix up between the Richmond defence and the GK saw the ball nestle straight into the Richmond net! 2-1 and Oli claiming the goal to be his (to be fair it was a hell of a ball).
Richmond got a rude shock as Tahuna started pressing hard for another goal, Sobi being an absolute nightmare in the middle of the park. Then as has always been the case this season, the captain Diego took it upon himself to push for the golden boot but hammering a shot on the edge of the box, keeper didn't stand a chance as it flew past him 2-2 as the half wound down. a flurry of subs saw Bernie off for Giambi, Sayha off for Benjamin and Dong on for Binh. Not long after the ref blew for halftime.
Some choice words from management saw the boys come back out ready to give 110%. Richmond would again go ahead not long into the second half after some neat play and using their youthful speed. 3-2...
Tahuna went straight at them with Dong running around like a young Ji Sung Park. Sobi who had been a menace all through the game received a pass on the edge of the box from Giambi, took 2 players on and unleashed a strike with his left foot straight into the keepers bottom left. Cure absolute scenes from the away end, 3-3 and the game was quickly turning to something of legendary status.
Richmond again pressed and some more subs from Tahuna saw Benjamin come off for Sayha who had been quiet in the first half save a heap of offside calls...
A mix up between Eric, Matty and Oli saw Richmond get their 4th of the game as the mins ticked down. 4-3. Thorsten down in the process and subbed off for Stefano. Ralph on for Will.
Tahuna pressed and who would have thought it, Sayha popped up and decided Diego wasn't going to get the golden boot that easily as he slotted home his 13th of the season to send the away end ballistic! Richmond looked deflated as Tahuna celebrated. Diego and Sayha tied on 13 goals each....
Things then got pretty heated after Dong was taken out by a Richmond player, Matty then went full John Deere and ploughed into the lad, cue limbs, pushing and inappropriate words between players. Lovely stuff!
Dong off for Binh and Giambi subbing off for Bernie once the melee had died down. 7mins on the clock....
Tahuna pressed and pressed with Matt screaming obscenities from the back to get the ball in the f**king net. Quan, Ralph, Sobi giving their absolute all in midfield, Diego and Sayha trying to find a way through. 4mins to go....
The atmosphere was unreall with both home and away fans and players screaming at both teams to get the winner. Tahuna broke down the right with Sobi making more passes to players in this game than he had done all season, flicked the ball to Sayha who under pressure from 2 Richmond players let fly with an absolute rocket of shot, straight into the keepers top left!
Limbs everywhere, chairs launched from the away technical area onto the pitch. Obscenities screamed from the Richmond clubhouse. Sayha absolutely swamped by his own team. A football purists wet dream!
Richmond kicked off as Stu screamed "park the f**king bus"! It didn't matter as the ref blew for fulltime. 9 goal thriller, coming back each time, 5-4 winners and to top it off Richmond handed over the NBF 3rd division challenge cup!
1x league, 1 challenge cup.
14 games, 11 wins, 1 draw, 2 losses, +20 goal difference, 34 points.
CHAMPIONS!
Match report by Stuart Mountain.
4th XI 2-1 FC Nelson
Location: Tahunanui S2
Goals: Keris 2
Match MVP: Keris
Once again down at the train station on a beautiful day for football the 4ths were ready to show what they are capable of.
An exciting start to the game saw Keris onto the end of a through ball from Wayne and taking it past the keeper and into the back of the net within the 1st minute of play. Fighting through plumes of smoke rolling across the pitch from the train maintenance taking place by the sideline Tahuna kept creating opportunity but ultimately the first half remained at 1-0.
At the start of the 2nd half both teams came out hungry for the win with both goals being peppered by shots and eventually Tahuna were able to double their lead, with a beautiful cross from Kodie being tipped onto the crossbar by the FC keeper only to fall onto the waiting head of Keris to give him a brace. FC not finished yet continued their pressure managed to put one past Luke. A now very tired Tahuna 4ths continued their defensive efforts despite Zach picking up another (thankfully minor) injury and being carried off the field and managed to hold to full time for the 3 points they were waiting for.
MOTM to Keris for his shift up front putting pressure on the FC defence. Also a big thanks to the supporters that showed to cheer us on.
Match report by Justin.
TFC Breakers 0-2 Richmond AFC Foxes
Location: Tahunanui S2
Goals:
Match MVP: Hannah Bibby On a stunning Saturday afternoon, the Tahuna Breakers welcomed the Richmond Foxes in front of an energetic crowd that lined the sidelines. The atmosphere was electric, with plenty of anticipation for what turned out to be one of the most thrilling games of the season.
Despite fielding just 12 players, the Breakers came into the match fired up. Fueled by a mix of sweets and energy drinks to shake off the remnants of the previous night, the team hit the field ready to prove themselves. From the first whistle, both sides came out strong, testing defensive lines with tough challenges and quick transitions.
At the heart of the Breakers’ resilience was MVP Hannah Bibby, who commanded the back line with authority. Her defensive organisation and pinpoint corner kicks kept the Foxes under pressure, forcing their goalkeeper and defenders into some nervy moments. Behind her, Arin stood tall in goal, limiting the Foxes to just two goals with sharp reads of play and fearless advances to cut off attacks that could have resulted in a much higher scoreline.
The defensive pairing of Rebecca and Alysha impressed with smart tackling and pace, frequently driving the ball into the opposition half and creating attacking opportunities. The Breakers may not have found the back of the net, but their technical play and tactical execution were the strongest of the season so far.
The day wasn’t only memorable for the on-field action. Post-match celebrations included a heart-warming announcement from Sayaka, who shared the exciting news of a future addition to her family — and perhaps a “little Breaker” in the years to come.
Match report by Cris Phelan.
TFC Masters 5-1 Wakefield FC Masters
Location: Tahunanui S3
Goals: Steve, Kev, Gaz, Ed2
Match MVP: Steve
A week on from arguably the masters best performance of the season the players were in good spirits and determined to break their Wakefield bogey team duck knowing only a win would guarantee 2nd place in the table. The name of the game in masters is possession and structured build up play so true to form the game started with frenzied end to end attack and counter attack. Chances were created and missed at both ends and it took a good 6 or 7 minutes of medium paced excitement for the game to settle. As the wind dropped from the veterans sails and the space opened up in midfield Tahuna exerted steady pressure, forcing a few corners and half chances. About half way through the half some neat build up play saw Tomas free to the left of the box and a low cross come shot was somewhat fortuitously controlled and swept into the bottom corner, squirming under the diving keeper by Kev. 1-0 Tahuna and hopes were high for approximately 30 seconds as the old boys forgot we weren't playing next goal's the winner and stood around confused as Wakefield kicked off and strolled up the park to spear a low drive into the far corner to level things up. Sails emptied of wind again, the battle raged on like Atari Pong in slo mo until moments from half time when Paddy found some space on the right wing and drove a cross in for Gaz to rise like a breaching humpback, slam a header home and take the masters into half time 2-1 up.
The second half continued in much the same fashion, Tahuna pressing and Wakefield countering with long balls to their lone forward. The space in midfield was being exploited time and again with neat through balls from Macca and Ed and the Wakefield AR was keeping warm waving his flag for offsides. Frustrations boiled and a long debate ensued over a Gaz goal after an offside flag the ref didn't blow for. The outcome was no goal and a sin bin for Cam followed by a reversal when the ref realised it was Gaz he meant to show the card to. Who knew they were twins... The delay and hilarity didn't knock Tahuna out of their stride and quicker than a sin bin sentence Tahuna went 3-1 up after more good work down the wing caused chaos in the Wakefield defence and the ball broke out to a charging Irish breaking into the box from right back to blast one in at the near post. Irish got his passport stamped and emigrated back to right back happy. The travel bug got the better of him though and he popped up on the edge of the box again minutes later to send one narrowly over the bar. The Celtic enthusiasm rubbed off on the rest of the team and the pressure continued with waves of attacks and chances. Ed was the benefactor on two more occasions with good build up play on the wing again. Gaz knocked one down for a thunderous drive past a flailing keeper and another low cross turned goalward at the near post blocked by a sliding defender ricocheted out for the doctor to squeeze home through a crowd of legs and prone bodies. And so it ended, another good performance on S3, 5 goals to 1, three points in the bag, second place in the league wrapped up and a monkey off the masters back. A happy end to an up and down season. Big thanks to the TFC Masters supporters club who both turned up regularly throughout the season to cheer(jeer) us on, we all left with smiles on our faces. Man of the match was the much travelled Steve (Irish) Match Report by Kevin Cooper.
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