9 August 2025
- bountymouse88
- Aug 11
- 8 min read
Updated: Aug 12
Division 1: Sprig + Fern Tahuna 1st XI Division 2: Sprig + Fern Tahuna 2nd XI
Division 3: Sprig + Fern Tahuna 3rd XI Division 4:
Women's Premiership: Sprig + Fern Tahuna Breakers Masters Football: Sprig + Fern Tahuna Masters
1st XI 4-3 FC Nelson Karenni - Price Charity Cup
Location: Tahunanui S3
Goals: Seth, Ethan, Luc
Match MVP: Seth Watson Tahuna Survive Karenni Comeback to March into the Semis
Tahuna edged a 4–3 classic against FC Karenni in a game that started with swagger, wobbled like a newborn calf, and ended with hearts in mouths.
Luc kicked things off with a thunderbolt from range that had the Karenni keeper questioning his career choices. The second was less “Match of the Day” and more “Sunday League chaos” — a goalmouth scramble eventually prodded over the line while Karenni’s defence looked like they’d just met each other.
At 2–0 up at halftime, spirits were high, and Ethan made it 3–0 early in the second half with a towering header into the corner. He’s still only scored with his head or from three inches out, but hey — they all count.
Just when it looked like cruise control, Tahuna’s defence decided to hand out charity goals, gifting Karenni two to make it 3–2. Game on. Enter skipper Seth, the six-yard specialist, tucking away yet another poacher’s finish to level the Golden Boot race with Ethan at six apiece — every single one from inside the penalty area’s smallest postcode.
Karenni nicked one back late on to make it 4–3, triggering full squeaky bum mode. Thankfully, the boys in blue clung on, helped by a ref who actually had a blinder (mark the date — it doesn’t happen often).
Man of the Match? Seth — for running himself into the ground, pestering their backline like an unwanted sales call, and proving that sometimes the best goals are the ugly ones.
Semi-final bound — and still the pride of the pub chat.
Match report by Joe Robertson.
2nd XI 4-1 Locomotive - Gould & Tout Trophy
Location: Neale Park S2
Goals: Will Mathews 3, Dan
Match MVP: Dan
We returned to Neale Park this week with 11 and a half good men to play Loco for the 3rd time this year. With a loss and a draw so far this year we knew it was going to be a tough game and the boys were well up for it.
Being a cup week it was win or go home so playing on the front foot was key.
It was a big ask with only 1 sub for half a game but Loco might be the one team we can match for age and fitness so it was worth a crack.
Danny hampton back up front was out the gate like a racehorse and it was clear from the off that the boys were happy to get forward in numbers. The football was direct and produced plenty of chances in the first 20 minutes with chances created regularly but without the finish. Until Will Mathews turned up again to get on the end of one from Dan Smith to settle things down at 1-0.
Geeza and Dan ran up and down the wings relentlessly to get balls in the box with Geeza coming close to extending the lead as he flashed on over the crossbar. Half time rolled around at 1-0, (should've been more) and we settled on our 11 players to see out the match.
A few early jitters in the 2nd half and things got a bit stretched leading to lapse that let a man through on goal from a long ball to make it 1-1.
Not to worry, Dan and Will decided to go it alone and pull us out of the fire with 2 more goals, each one ever so slightly better than the previous.
A hattrick for Will and a hattrick of assists for Dan.
While we had 11 on the field, the last 15 minutes was played with 9 as the legs started to tire.
No one told Dan though, so he kept running up and down, which was rewarded with the the best goal of the game as Raimund broke through the defense on half way, then slipped a nice ball through for Dan to run on to, and calmly slot it home through the keepers legs.
It's the magic of the cup.
On to the final against the Seals and its sure to be another cracker.
Next week we host FC Development in a must win game.
Up Up
Match report by James Munday.
3rd XI - NG
Location: Goals:
Match MVP:
Match report by Stuart Mountain.
4th XI 2-1 Wakefield 2nd XI
Location: Saxton Field
Goals: Brad, Jonny
Match MVP: Max
With another beautiful weekend the 4ths made their way out to Wakefield for some football and the obligatory visit to the beloved Wakey Bakey.
The first half showed that both teams were hungry for a good game of football and with an early corner landing at Brad’s feet by the back post Tahuna once again opened the scoring. Continuing on, both sides applying pressure and taking chances when they came Tahuna eventually managed to double their lead with Jonny getting the ball in the box and slotting it past the keeper into the back of the net. Wakefield, not yet done competing, continued to attack with one shot near the end of the first half only going over the goal due to Luke diving across the goal fully outstretched to make a world class save.
Going into the 2nd half 2-0 up and now down to one sub due to injury and Stu only being available for the first half Tahuna had an undoubtedly challenging 2nd half ahead of them. The first part of the 2nd half went much like the first with both teams making opportunities but no changes to the scoreline. All was going well until Kyle made a slightly misjudged tackle on a threatening through ball run earning the 4ths their first official card in 3 seasons and a red one at that. Now down to 10 men with less than 20 minutes to play Tahuna needed to adjust but Wakefield took full advantage and scrambled one into the net. Now under intense pressure Tahuna managed to defend for the remaining play time and pull the 3 points for the win.
Massive thanks to Stu and Matt for coming out and playing for us this weekend and big props to MOTM and Captain Max for his excellent work in midfield.
Match report by Justin.
TFC Breakers 2-7 Suburbs FC
Location: Saxton Field S2
Goals: Hannah, Sayaka
Match MVP: Sayaka It started, as Michelle would say, on a sunny day! However, for the Breakers, the
perfect weather was a stark contrast to the dark cloud of challenges they faced. With
a squad already depleted by injuries, sickness and struggling for numbers, they
knew they had a massive task ahead of them against a stacked Suburbs side.
The opening minutes were a whirlwind of unfortunate events, culminating in a
moment that would have been funny if it weren't so painful. Within the first two
minutes, a clearance from Jenna took a wicked turn and found the back of her own
net, giving Suburbs an early lead and leaving the Breakers stunned. It was a 4-0
deficit before they knew it, and the match seemed all but over.
But then, a glimmer of hope. Sayaka, fierce and dominant in the middle, had been
battling back from a knee injury and was showing no signs of holding back. Her
determination paid off in a brilliant moment of skill as she found the back of the net
with a beautiful goal. It was a flash of genius that sparked a fire in the Breakers
bellies, reminding them that they could still fight.
The game became a fierce battle. Suburbs were hot on their heels, and a moment of
frustration saw them earn a yellow card. Hannah, stepping up to take the resulting
free kick, curled a powerful shot that seemed destined for the top corner, only for the
Suburbs keeper to make a magnificent diving save, knocking it over the crossbar
with inches to spare.
The physical toll of the match was mounting. Sophies ankle was brutally attacked,
and she was forced off the field. It was a cruel blow, followed by another when Ruby
was also “stomped on”, leaving the Breakers with only ten players on the field and an
uphill battle that just got steeper.
Despite the disadvantages, the teams spirit never wavered. Hannah sent in a
perfectly curled corner kick that sailed into the box, 4-2. That moment was quickly
overshadowed, however, when she made a diving save with her hands. The referee,
however, saw the move as an intentional handball and gave her a red card, which
saw the Breakers go down to just nine players and a penalty that was converted.
In the end, the Breakers fought valiantly with only nine players. A special mention
must go to Marijke, who battled in defence with an existing injury, a testament to the
teams incredible resilience. Rebecca’s beautiful flying ‘duck’ also made an
appearance in the game.
The final score was 7-2 to Suburbs, but the Tahuna Breakers left it all on the field,
showing heart and grit against all odds.
On to the next!!
Match report by Hannah Bibby.
TFC Masters 0-3 Suburbs FC Masters
Location: Saxton Field S2
Goals:
Match MVP: Cam
The skullduggery started before a ball was kicked this week. Nelson Suburbs relaxed gently into their prematch routine near their club rooms whilst Tahuna Masters were sent on a treasure hunt footy pitch tour around Richmond. Our clutch control in mouldys was still being put to the test when Suburbs finally revealed where we’d actually be playing. No time to warm up properly this week. Paddy was wound up, “we’ve got to smash these guys!” The real housewives of Nelson Suburbs sipped their flutes of champers as the whistle blew and Suburbs got the game underway. In fairness, they’re a good team. They pushed our back line time and time again. But whatever questions they posed, Cam, Ben, Zane, Pete and Ollie seemed to have the answers. Cam in particular was on fire, his shiny bald head was constantly butting crosses away. As Kev so poetically put, the Cam Man offered more blocks than a Lego masters hobby room. And on the rare occasions someone slipped past all action Cam, either Ollie was there to smother away the ball or Ben stepped in to choke their attacking thrust. Ben had an outstanding first half. The way he snuffed up a Suburbs stride into our penalty area summed up the bodies-on-the-line, “not on my watch,” team effort of the first 45. We had our chances in the first half too.. Kev and Gaz had decent strikes outside the 18 yard box and Diego broke past their defence for a 1 on 1 shot against their keeper.
Second half they came at us again from the off. Ollie was called into sweeper keeper action to take out a through ball, he beat their on running striker to a clearance. Unfortunately the ball popped out to the midfield and one of the Suburbs playmakers controlled a struck beauty into the gaping vacant goal, 1-0 Suburbs. Our midfield was repeatedly kicked or pushed over the moment they got the ball. No time to breathe. The threshold for a booking in masters games is very very high. It doesn’t often help our cause. Ed must have been wearing some posh cologne on his legs as the Suburbs took a real shining to the back of his shins. Gaz was played through into the box at one point and Cole and Paddy had strides into the final third. But a mixture of Eastern European defence tactics and the Suburbs refusal to let us have more than 2 passes in a row made it challenging to create decent shots on goal. At the other end Suburbs carved out an opening at the edge of our box and dispatched it with aplomb, 2-0 Suburbs. We tried to keep our heads up but we were tiring at this point. The sticky pitch and our smaller sub bench started to hurt. Suburbs however were rolling substitutes on and off every minute. Ben, who reffed the second half got RSI from blowing his whistle. He threatened a ban on any more Suburbs substitutes. Suburbs reacted as if Ben had pooed on their pitch. They kept on pressing and the law of averages paid off when one of their corners hit the back of a Suburbs player and popped into our goal, 3-0. The last real event of the game was a cross and header from Suburbs which brought out an absolute worldie of a save from Ollie. He had a great game. We go again next week. I’m sending Cam to a laboratory to be cloned. 5 of them would be nice. Match Report by Peter.
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